Often complaints are requests that we have repressed. We believe our ego when it says – I shouldn’t have to ask for it, it’s obvious.
The bottom line is we don’t make requests soon enough because we are in fear. We think we aren’t good enough. We are scared of the truth. We resist setting boundaries and moments of confronting communication.
All because we believe our ego when it says – Watch out you don’t want to be the bad guy!. Yet the consequence of listening to the fear is that in the end we do become the bad guy and we explode into complaining.
Complaining seems small and common (everybody at work does it) like a water drop from the Water Chinese Torture. Drops of water falling one by one gradually created a hollow.
The last complaint I thought of today was: Spotify sucks this ad is the worst! What was your last complaint?
I invite you to transition from complaint thoughts to spoken requests. Be ok with a “Yes” a “No” or a “Counter Offer” as an answer. Forget about – Things are going to get awkward, things are already awkward. Stand in integrity. Speak your truth.
If your complaint has no other person to deal with, such as –I hate that is gloomy today. Take the appropriate action to adjust to reality or switch your gear to think of ways in witch you can change the reality for yourself. I like visualizing a computer screen typing the complaint and then hitting the delete key and re-typing my request, “adjust to reality” thought or find a “new reality” thought. An example of a new “reality thought” will be (using the example above) driving to place where it isn’t gloomy.
To stop complaining is one of the must difficult things there are. But is not impossible. I used to be a complainer in my early twenties and I think I’ve gotten better through the years. Yet the practice of filtering out complains from my thoughts and my words is always with me.
This video is a reminder of how much difference we can make in our lives if we stop and observe what are we cultivating in the world through our energy, emotions and words.
I hope all my tips on stop complaining help you. If they do please tell me about your experience. I would love to hear about it.
Before you put a negative thought into the world. Stop and think, you are only responsable and in charge of yourself nothing else. If you need to vent thats ok, yet stay away from wining your life away.
This is a kind invitation to stop complaining. Life becomes much better and miracles start to happen when you do.
How much complainers around you affect your day to day life? How much do you think you complain “1” being once a month “10” being every 30 min.? non-spoken complaints count. Would you be open to start a “Stop Complaining Challenge”? Remember that what we share can be medicine for someone else and for sure a step closer to a stronger vida!